Dear Reader,
I was watching the delayed Olympic events on NBC, and though I’ve known for hours that Jordan Weiber did not qualify for the all-around finals for women’s gymnastics, it was still heartbreaking to see it on television. Her face. Her tears. And what’s worse is that in an attempt to escape the press, she was told that it was something she had to do–standard procedure, if you will, for all competitors that are partaking in an event of this magnitude.
And that leads me to a question that I have yet to find the answer to myself. Is there a proper way to feel or to react when you’ve lost something dear to a close friend? In this situation for instance, where you feel happy for them, yet can’t help but to be swept up in the overwhelming sadness and disappointment that you feel for yourself. On the one hand, the answer is no, in the sense that one should be allowed to act and feel the way they actually feel on the inside. If you’re feeling sad, then you should have the right to feel sad until you can come to terms with the situation. However, in times like this, social procedure says, “Yes. There is a proper way to react.” It calls for you to put on a brave face and congratulate your friend and fellow competitor on their victory. And this doesn’t just apply strictly to times when you’re on national television or in any public social situation. This social norm has long since been embedded into our minds as the “right” way to feel, lest you want to be considered a bad friend or a sore loser.
And that’s what I personally end up doing. I harbor any bad feelings I have, stuff in a box, and bury it deep inside my heart. But truth be told, those bad feelings just never go away when you do that because even if they aren’t at the forefront of your thoughts, they have a knack for coming back from the dead to haunt you every time you reach your hand into the depths of sadness. Talk about being emotionally unhealthy…
– Jon
theprinceoftheclouds 